I wonder if those who denigrate LGBT people, realize they exacerbate and contribute to the bullying and the cruel violence directed at a marginalized minority. One wonders if such people have known a gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender person in their life? And when a specific man denigrates women – a gender often subject to discrimination and even violent treatment at the hands of men, one wonders who the women in that person’s life might have been. Did he have a mother, a sister, an aunt, a grandmother, a daughter – a wife?
Here is someone we can wonder about:
Is this the man you would want as a husband – a lover – a father? Neville Fleishman, – Johannesburg, South Africa – That is his name. A troll? A friend to some? A bully?
One then wonders about homophobia and its meaning as it pertains to people like Fleishman- what do they fear? Their own queer thoughts and fantasies? That anyone may be different? Is he a repressed homosexual running from his truth. Maybe even transgender – too afraid to acknowledge his authentic gender. If the latter I would try to understand the lashing out – yet so many of us have come out – amidst our terror – without hurting or bullying others.
So when one Neville Fleishman, a white South African man, launched an attack on me in a Facebook group post – and no he is NO friend of mine – the Admin of the page noted the following:
“Since this was directed to a member of this group in a rather derogatory and sexist way I have to say that postings like this show little respect and have no place on this page. I have no problem with the image being posted, free speech and all – pathetic and homophobic as it really is – but directing it to a member in the manner in which it was, is not acceptable. So kindly follow the rules unless there’s some other unspoken conversation we are not all privy to.”
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I can only wonder about the following people who endorsed this hateful and hurtful post on Face Book with the flick of a “like” – amused no doubt at his spiteful assault- Do they endorse Fleishman’s homophobic sentiments or do they get a benefit of the pat on the back for pure ignorance?
Here they are:
Roy Chassay – 4 mutual friends
Shelley Jacobson Cobb– 3 mutual friends
Allen Berkowitz – 2 mutual friends
Mark Saltzman – 2 mutual friends
Is this the man you would want to do business with – give your business to – as an employee?
My comment and his response:
Maybe Mr. Fleishman is just another terrified loser taking his frustration out on a world that he cannot control by targeting successful people who actually do well and do some good in this world:
A series of failed and failing businesses speaks volumes –
Oscoco (Pty) Ltd – Food Processing in Johannesburg
Temima –Dynamic Reflective !!!!The admin asked me if I wanted Fleishman booted off the Face Book group page – I responded that I would prefer if they allowed him to stay on – after all if the man keeps kicking himself in the nutz – let him have at it! Apparently they booted him anyway-!
Melanie,
This reminds me of the book of poems by Charles Lamb: “Thoughtless Cruelty.” Most evil acts seem to be unpremediated acts of thoughtless cruelty. Sadly, I think that means we are hard-wired for a certain amount of human indifference. We shut ourselves away from the suffering of others and refuse to see them as human beings, for to do so would be to let their own pain in to our lives. It is also the reason I love Pema Chodron’s books and teachings on Mindful Awareness and on making the sharing of other people’s suffering your strength.
But I also agree with Morgan Freeman on so many bigots: “I don’t really understand the word ‘homophobia.’ It is not a phobia. You are not scared. You are an A$$—-.”
– Jim
Thanks Jim for weighing in – yes!